These days the social landscape is changing and the most nerve-racking part of asking someone out is the face-to-face interaction. After your heart rate has returned to normal and you’ve added her to your contact list, it’s time to call her up. Here are a couple tips on how to do so without sounding desperate, rude, or creepy:
You don’t have to wait 3-5 days after getting a girl’s number to ask her out! If you’re some guy she sees occasionally at the gym she’ll forget about you. If you’re interested in seeing her in something a little nicer than sweaty workout clothes, then do not hesitate to ask her out. Genuinely being interesting in getting to know someone means you probably want to see them the next day or for dinner two days from now. Get a hold of her ASAP so you can set up plans and she can see how excited you are! But be reasonable – don’t text her as she’s walking away from you or right when she gets home (to see if she “got home safely”) because that’s intensely creepy and she’ll probably stop going to the gym where she knows she’ll see you.
Once you think it’s appropriate to contact her, you have two options: to call or to text. If you choose to text, send a clear, concise message: Reintroduce yourself, stay away from sarcasm and unclear jokes, and don’t fall into a texting conversation. How awkward would a first date be if you texted for the 36 hours prior to dinner and didn’t have anything to say while you were there?! You are all interesting bros with cool stuff to talk about, so make her wait until you see her in person. The same rules apply for a phone conversation. Although she can hear your voice to detect sarcasm, she still might not know you well so you don’t want to say anything that would unknowingly offend her or creep her out. The most important rule of all is to NEVER say anything you wouldn’t say in person. This applies for flirting and sexting especially, but that could be a whole different article.
Date went well? Follow up!
If everything went smoothly, she’ll appreciate hearing that the date went well for you and you’d like to see her again. You two can set up your next date – you could go to dinner again, go to a brewing company, go rock climbing, or stay inside and enjoy a romantic comedy perfect for both of you.
Keep in mind that every girl is different. Some girls will feel uncomfortable if you call to set up your first date, while other girls will love the fact that you’re brave enough to dial her up. These are all things you can discretely determine just by asking. If you’re not sure whether to call or text, straight up ask while she’s giving you her number! There’s no harm in saying, “So is it cool if I call you to hang out? Maybe (insert activity here) (insert time here).” One thing that every girl loves: Confidence.
Don’t compromise your chance with the chick you like by waiting 5 days to call her. Send her a clear, concise message that you want to take her out and then go have fun!